26 Mayo 2015

Mayan Pit of DOOM vs. Honduras Cesspool

After watching the sun rise from the veranda above the college dorm this morning we gathered in the mess hall to chow down on some fruit and cereal. Loaded the van and truck with tools, supplies and contented souls to head out to our respective job sites. Jefe Mater, Marco, Office Donnie, Hodo and Hunterzilla returned to the villa de camino to finish installing the roof for the bathrooms. Jefe Mater started pulling the wires… let me rephrase that, he and the others held a 30 minute meeting to discuss the art of pulling wires and using his micrometer to center the light boxes to within .002 +/- .001 thousandth of an inch on center… perfection like this does not come cheap folks! Major Hodo helped me install to razor sharp tin on the roof, unfortunately his cowbell was out of tune and had to be airlifted to San Pedro Sula for repairs. After the roof was completed I went to the Luz de Valle school to start laying bricks for the Mayan Pit of DOOM. Jefe Mater, Hodo, Officer Donnie and Hunterzilla stayed behind to finish the wiring project after they finished their mandatory union café break(s) and joined us soon after.

Meanwhile… Senor Jefe Chris the Scorpion King and his Scottish kilt donning clan battled the dredded pool of cess in the school yard… Larry, Que Pasa, Madster, Wilbur, Nico and Rosie and lest we never forget to mention the india loco Hondurans consisting of the two Maynor’s and Juan Pablo Montoya. Master Jefe Daniela came by earlier in the morning to lay out the footing for the Pit of DOOM, which happened to be directly over the drain field for the latrine pit, can you say, “Gag me with a spoon”… they stabbed it with their steely knife, but they just can’t kill the beast. Some reports surfaced that there was several members of the clan that wanted to paint themselves with the blacken soil they had discovered, one person thought that had struck it rich like Jed Clampett and was planning on moving to Beverly Hills when we returned… I think they will need to visit a doctor and get a couple of shots of penicillin personally.

After Daniela returned, he saw the light of day and the err of his ways and moved the Pit of DOOM away from the pool and the team pounced at the opportunity to dig another footing, this time on dry land…  let the Mooking Feista begin! I feel as though I need to give a refresher course on the term MOOK. It is a substance that consists of multiple ingredients; course and fine aggregates, water, Portland cement and a lot of sweat… The law of the land requires that when Mook is on the ground, you must have a partner to Mook properly… our teams motto is: Two Working As a Team which meets all criteria for local, state and Federation building codes. Remember folks, Safety First! Lift and sift, time to turn before you burn, don’t let the volcano spill over until the time is right. It is a fine art that has been passed down by many generations, but it took some American ingenuity to take this time honored tradition and create a new buzz word in the land of Qumistand… The word is MOOK! And Mook we did!

With the footings dug in a cess free zone the Mook was poured and the bricks were laid in the heat of the day. My Mooking partner for the day was none other than my old friend Larry. She said it was her first time Mooking, but her rapid and swift ability to wield the trowel lead me to believe she had Mooked before… I had a moment of guilt Mooking with Larry because my long time Mooking partner B-Rad the Blog Master could not come this year. Sorry buddy, if you can’t Mook with the one you love… Mook with the one you’re with.

As the sun, that brought such hope of a new day, the sweltering heat of mid-day had begun to fade behind the tree line, the Pit of DOOM was half way complete. Tomorrow we will have our first sacrifice with Senor Jefe Chris the Scorpion King leading the service. We returned to the compound and dined on pork chops, rice and salad prepared by our beautiful cooks and hostess Sandra and Company. See you on the dark side of the moon.

Marco Francisco Valle Valle